My Endo Diary

Endometriosis awareness month is fast approaching! Endometriosis UK are focusing their awareness campaign between the 2nd - 9th March. For March, I have made an awareness profile picture. If any endosisters would like me to edit one for them, just send your photo to my twitter account @my_endo_diary and I will be more than happy to do it for you. Here is mine... And this will be my mother's... We will be uploading them as our profile pictures from the 1st of March for the whole month. The more awareness we can all raise, the better!! #MyEndoDiary

Endometriosis comes with so many struggles and obstacles that you have to fight to overcome. It can sometimes feel like a burden, stopping you from doing small things such as completing daily task. On the larger scale, it can stop you from achieving your dreams. It can become overwhelming and take over your life. Some days it feels like there'll be no relief from the pain. For that reason, a few weeks ago I mustered up some courage (or some may see it as a moment of madness!) and I went for an endo tattoo! I wanted something feminine that also represented the strength and courage needed to endure this chronic illness. Here is the result: Now I'm not going to lie.... IT HURT! A LOT! But all I could remind myself was that if I can get through endo pain, I could certainly get through a tattoo. I am so happy with the result. Now during times of struggle, I can look down at my tattoo and remind myself of my strength. During happier times it will be a reminder of what I have ...

Preparing for a bad day with endometriosis and expecting the unexpected is becoming a chore. I want to feel normal. I want to go a whole day without taking any painkillers. I want to get through a day without my hot water bottle or electric heat pad. I want to be able to say yes to plans, months, weeks or even just days ahead. I want to be able to go out and not come home early because the pain has crept out of nowhere or it has become to hard to manage. I want to be able to stand for long periods of time without getting crippling back and leg pain. I want to have a normal stomach, not one that swells and makes me look 5 months pregnant. I want to know what it feels like to go a day without a stabbing pain that comes out of the blue and leaves you curled over, holding onto something to steady yourself. I want to have a period that doesn't leave me bed bound for a week. I want to carry out the simplest of tasks like getting out of bed or going in the shower, without feeling...

How do you go from feeling like for the first time (in a long time) you're actually living your life and having a great day with friends, dancing, singing, drinking and generally having fun... to less than a week later, being curled up in bed crying with the pain, praying the stronger meds will kick in? At one moment you get hope, clarity and life, with a big sense of normality. The next you're faced with pain, upset and darkness, with no sense of it ever being normal again. Why does life with endometriosis have to go from one extreme to the other. The lows are definitely more prominent than the highs at the moment. Or maybe that could be because I give the rare high days so much attention, that as soon as they're snatched away, it makes me feel more lost than usual and back at square one. How do you mentally find a balance when there is no way of controlling what endo will do next? #MyEndoDiary

The word chronic is used to describe an illness that lasts a long time or one which constantly reoccurs. When referring to chronic pain, it means pain that has lasted more than three to six months. A serious condition which lasts less than this time scale is usually referred to as acute pain. The most common types of chronic pain include headaches, backaches and pain from an injury. Other sources stem from the shoulders, neck, pelvis, muscle or nerve pain.  Chronic pain can vary in severity, it can fluctuate from mild to severe, be sporadic or continuous. It can be described as shooting, aching or burning feelings. You can get discomfort, stiffness or soreness. Unfortunately, pain doesn't come alone. People with chronic pain also report changes in their moods, fatigue, insomnia and the need to rest a lot more. There are different types of chronic pain which depending on location or illness, are put into different categories. Endometriosis falls into what's known as nocicep...

Today is exactly one year to the day that I was diagnosed with depression. August 11th last year I had my first panic attack after being extremely depressed for a few months. August 12th last year I had to finally admit that I couldn't control it. I couldn't hide it and certainly couldn't cope with it anymore. I was taken to the doctors by my mother and put on antidepressants. I wrote a post last year on my diagnosis which I found quite hard to write. (Click here  to view.) This second one is not proving to be any easier for me. I can write about my endometriosis symptoms quite easily, all the ins and outs of it, I find it as a second nature to be as open as I possibly can. So why when it comes to my mental health do I feel myself clam up and struggle? The honest truth of the situation is I don't think I portrayed the full extent of my depression last year. Even close friends and family wouldn't know the full extent of it. Thinking back on the thoughts I was havin...

At my Gynaecology appointment last week I was referred to Pain Management. I was more than surprised to be contacted the next day to be told they could fit me in a day later. I was somewhat apprehensive on what would be suggested... if anything! I am so used to explaining to doctors about endometriosis and my symptoms to just be met with a blank look across their faces. If I am being completely honest, I thought it would be a waste of time, but worth going as I've tried everything else that's been thrown at me. I'm happy to report that I was completely wrong with my prejudgment. I met an endometriosis specialist nurse at the University of Wales Hospital who went through every single one of my pains and symptoms. A history of my pain was noted as well as current pains, including what types of pain I get during cycles, pains during the rest of the month, energy levels and sleep. Thorough is an understatement. We also talked through my current pain medications (Tramadol, O...