My Endo Diary

Last night was one of the worst nights I've had in a long long time. It started on Thursday when I had my review with the specialists at the hospital. As I've mentioned before I had the mirena coil inserted in February during my lap. I started taking norethisterone in June due to continuous bleeding, it's now nearly September and even though bleeding is light I'm still on every day :( So during the review I was advised to stop the norethisterone (which I have been taking four times a day) and start taking the combined pill again. The reason they explained for this is that the coil and norethisterone both produce proestrogen. They believe too much of this hormone has caused upset and continuous bleeding. So since changing meds Thursday and Friday I was still bleeding but pain wise ok.. I felt extremely positive leaving the review on Thursday. I was happy we were trying something new and felt I was making progress. Last night was a whole different...

I've gone past the frustrated state I was in this morning. I've gone past the anger, the feeling that I would like to slap that Dr right across the face. Gone past feeling annoyed, wound up and livid. I'm now upset. My first ever blog  was about how the majority of doctor's dismiss endo. Today it happened once again.. << Rewind to the beginning of last week (as I stated in my previous blogs), I started a new hormonal medication called Norethisterone to help with my treatment of endo. I am also on evorel patches to counteract the side effects that come with my treatment. Since the new tablets started the patches have not been working and my emotions and mood swings have gone right out of the window. So I arranged an appointment with my GP today for some help with 3 simple things.. 1. A sick note to cover me for my time off from work this week. 2. Higher dose evorel/hormone patch to help me cope with the rise in side effects from the new medication. 3. More...

At the moment I’m sitting at home after having to ring in sick to work, again , having cramps, vaginal pain, feeling sorry for myself. Its my birthday next Sunday.. I’ll be 24. When I had my laparoscopy in February I really thought by the time my birthday came I’d be recovered. Finished with endo. Done. Instead, I’ll be a 24 year old that still has an extremely swollen stomach. Still looking five months pregnant and living in my oversized black cardigan just to try and hide the bloated look a little. I don’t think it works, I most probably still look fat or pregnant to others, but its become a kind of comfort and I hardly go anywhere without it on. Since all this started, my swollen stomach was the first main symptom (along with shooting/stabbing pains) that I had and knew instantly something was wrong. Since then, my stomach has never gone down to what it was before. Granted some days its not as bad, but its never flat or ‘normal’. I’ve forgotten what normal looks or feels like. I’m...

Today its June 13 th . I had my lap February 15 th . Four months on, am I cured? No (wishful thinking).. Have I found all the answers I’m looking for? No not yet.. Am I better? Slightly. But nowhere near as much as I hoped. I now see I was a little naïve to think the I’d have the lap and hey presto! Im back to me again! So where am I now? Well to date, I have had four prostap injections. On the last check up at the hospital we realised that it hasn’t been working for me as it should have. For any that do not know, prostap is similar to Lupron - which is supposed to shut down your ovaries and stop your periods. I however continued to have periods while on prostap and for much much longer than normal. Last month I was on for three weeks of the month! They have decided to try me on a new medication called Norethisterone (I have no idea how to pronounce that?!) a hormonal tablet to be taken three times a day. Its been a week and I have had no spotting, no bleeding. Yay! On the oth...

The last year and half has been a rollercoaster to say the least. Both physically and mentally. For the majority of it, I went through each day thinking I was going mad. That the pain must have been all in my head because every single test that I had done came back clear.  The only obvious result I felt was I getting was that I was going insane. Confusion was an understatement and even to this day there is still a lot of it around. Confusion from doctors not knowing what was causing the pain, ignorance from other doctors not believing I actually did have pain, confusion from test results, from wrong diagnosis and from myself. Just not knowing what to do for the best. Who to go to next for help. Trying to convince myself that what I was experiencing wasn’t ‘normal.’ That I didn’t just have to put up with it. So I spent endless time googling symptoms (…bad idea). Although I still do it now - I cant seem to stop myself! I think I may have a slight addiction.. Free Advice: Trying to ...

So, it's been a week and half after my second Prostap injection (similar to lupron/zoladex) and I feel (dare I say it...??) FINE! :) Great actually.. Someone asked me this week how I was feeling and I answered 'happy'..I had to double check it was me who wrote it! I even caught myself singing on the weekend! ;) Wow! It's honestly been the best I've felt in over a year! I was umming and ahhing whether to write this blog or not because I didn't want to 'jinx' myself and set myself up for a fail. But I come to the conclusion that it's definitely something to blog about, a cause for celebration! Don't get me wrong, I still at times feel awful. Mind of a 23 year old, body of an 80 year old with all my aches, and I still get days when I can't even bring myself to get out of bed. Other times i'm wide awake til stupid o'clock in the morning, only to sleep a few hours then BANG! Wide awake again. I still need to take painkillers, have backach...

As I was blasting the music out of my headphones this week, this one song in particular really stood out.. 'Alicia Keys - Superwoman' . The words all the way through the song are spot on and can mean so much to so many different people. But I thought how true these words in particular were for us endosisters dealing with endometriosis on a daily basis... "...Even when I'm a mess, I still put on a vest With an S on my chest Oh yes, I'm a Superwoman..." But somedays, we just have to. No matter how much pain we may be in that day, no matter how emotional or all over the place we are feeling, or just plain exhausted. We just have to carry on and get through the day the best we can. Whether its because we have to work, go to school, college, do the weekly shop, look after children, housework - anything. Even the smallest of things can be a huge mountain to climb at times. But I just wanted to let every woman who may be reading this know that we are s...